For an up-close peek at the inner workings of Canadian culture, have a look at what the Rona Hardware store is offering children to buy their Dads for Father’s Day.

I chose garden expert. Here’s what’s on offer:

See that? Things to hack the garden back lest it take over, and then blowers to blow the cut-off bits away. That’s not all. Look:

Petroleum! Sorry, no hand tools or any such thing. As an acquaintance told me twenty-five years ago, if you can’t do it with a machine, it’s not worth doing. And one more thing:

You can wash down anything that’s left. Moss maybe? With a Karcher, it’s soon gone. In countries like Germany, people like to sit outdoors under the trees. Beer gardens and all. In Canada, we’re still beating the bush back. And if you don’t think that’s racist, well, well, well.