Rule 1. Public Space is Created by Walls Within Public Space.

This is called private space.

2. Sometimes a Tree Planted on Public Space Has to Be Killed to Create Private Space Out of Public Space.

This is called “a view.”

3. A View Over Public-Private Space is the Most Environmentally Responsible Garden

A pink flamingo will suffice to make the view of this private relationship public. This is called “graffiti tagging.” Tattooing.

$500,000 will buy you half of this view. The public view is a view of the private ownership. Plus the flamingo.

4. Too expensive? There are cheaper options. You Can Own the Ownership That Blocks Your Public View.

But only as a conversation.

5. You Are Allowed to Liberally Use Military Technology To Prevent Conversations and Maintain Your Privacy Within Public Space.

This is called art. It is a form of storage.

6. Carefully Constructed Landscaping Walls Turn Road Margins Into Public Gardens.

This is called “slope stabilization.” Here’s some six months after being created by a group of men who don’t live on the Earth but were only visiting from their cell phones.

This is called “Urban Planning on Paper Only.” There are no penalties for this misbehaviour.

7. Private Space Can Be Maintained by Creating Undesirable Public Space That Signifies Private Space

It enlarges private space at public cost, and appears on public documents as “parkland,” although its purpose is only to claim common land to enhance private land.

8. It is All Bodily Space.

It is all body imagery. This nest, for instance.

This fence that moves deer away from their routes to the valley bottom and into subdivisions, where they are killed by “conservation officers” to protect “public safety” and “private gardens.”

9. Two Bags of Garbage Can Make a Public Space Private

In this way even a car can become a house.

10. You Can Maintain a Sense of Humour

More Gardening, With Bird Scare

Two observations, if I may. 1. All of this nonsense takes place within stolen indigenous land, and 2. This sense of humour is a gift from indigenous culture. Which is to say, we the people have a common relationship to this nonsense. We can stop it.