Yes, that’s an upside-down Moose Crossing sign and a Telus Smart Security Sign as an oar. Or is that a sail? No, the flag is the sail!

Look, when you inherit a country from a people who weren’t online and were outside gardening, instead, you have to do what you have to do to put it into some kind of order. The family below has outdone themselves.

Notice the landscape fabric to keep down weeds under gravel, but not enough gravel, the neat quadrant design, the hazelnut bushes chopped down, because free nuts to eat in the Fall, that’s just weird, right, the creosote-impregnated railroad ties from the 1980s, and the bed of soil, covered with bark mulch, now gone high tech with the plastic. It’s a war, that’s what it is, against the humans of the past and the Earth.

Back, though, to the marina. Note how this place has everything: a couple old fruit trees pruned down to stumps, firewood from an old growth fir, because eagles, pshaw, a $5,000 stairway in back, and three generations of manufactured railings to keep you from falling off the flat bits. Pretty darned beautiful, isn’t it. What follows might be in the Okanagan, but it’s not an Okanagan neighbourhood.

Sorry, guys. Eat your hearts out.